Me   : You're about to go somewhere?
Mom: Yes, I need to get these chillis milled. But Father is sleeping now.
Me   : I'll drive you then! ^^
Mom: ........................... ^^;;;
Me   : No? Afraid gonna have a heart attack?
Mom: Yes.

My mom has so much faith in me x)

Driving License

Got my driving license a week ago.

Still can't quite believe that now I can drive a car.

Finally.

It took long enough for me to finally gathered all the courage, not over thinking it and just be done with it.

The result is sweet, a piece of card that basically says "Yes, you have the legal permit to drive a car now. Congratulations."

All I need to do now is gather all the courage one more time to drive it alone. With no one beside me. No one to accompany. No driving teacher, no sister.

This level of anxiety I have, is sad *facepalms*

Whyyyy.

Oh well, might just go around the neighbourhood first before hitting the fast lane.

And before that, I might have to stare at mirror first and hypnotist myself to be brave. *banging head on the wall*

On non-car related news, I'm still suffered from frustration-because-your-team-has-just-lost syndrome. Usually it doesn't take this long. I blame the hormones. Oh don't you just love to be a woman? Blame it all on hormones.

/end of sarcasm

But seriously, I need my Patronus pronto, because this situation is neither healthy for my mental stability, nor for the scale at home *coughcough* The Patronus charm has broken. Perhaps I need to have a good sight seeing to grow the mood back. Perhaps this sight seeing could involves a car. And driving. And alone.

I'm sexy blabbering and I know it.

Oh well, one could use a media to pour one's thought without restriction.

.......

Now let me get back to listening to Muse and drown in the magic that is their music and save the internet from my self.

Blue Vs Red

Sometimes you just knew it.

Prior the heated derby I already had a bad hunch about it.

Got butterflies on my stomach.

The feel of dread instead of excitement.

The pessimistic hint that crept in every time the Blues spoke about the derby in optimistic tone.

I just knew it.

Much how I just knew it when Juventus lost to Them Who Shall Not Be Mentioned and Them Who Shall Not Be Mentioned's neighbour-team.

I didn't feel as excited as I should had been. I felt fear more than excited. I felt nervous and not the good kind of nervous. It's the kind of nervous that you get when you know something is going to be wrong and I hate it when I'm right about dreadful stuff.

I'm glad my so called psychic ability only works on minor problems, though. I'd hate to predict the ends of the world.

Came the day of the much talked derby.

Two Manchester's power houses.

The Red Devils visited The Blue Moon.

Needless to say I was torn.

Manchester United is my past, present and I believe, my future too.

I had their jersey when I was 14 and still in love with MU class of 92.

Speaking the names of Nicky Butt, Gary Neville, David Beckham, Eric Cantona, Dennis Irwin, David May, Edwin Van Der Sar, Peter Schmeichel still give me goosebumps. And Ole Gunnar Solskjaer, The Baby Faced Assassin, is still my favorite striker up until today. My love for The Red Devils is just as red as my blood.

But then Mancini took over Manchester City and the way David Silva plays stole my heart away. That darn wizard. Most importantly, have you ever seen how Manchester City play when they are at their best? David Silva will relentlessly all over the defenders from all directions, persistently making holes between their defense and creating chances and assists for Tevez or Aguero or Dzeko, or Balotelli to finish. Yaya Toure will be the solid rock you can count on in the middle, where all the attack begins. They will be toying  with their opponent and enjoy every minute of it. And Vincent Kompany will be the solid center back that have no mercy to nullify the threats. With Joe Hart in front of the goal, opponents will have a hard time to score when he's at his best performance. Just ask Tottenham.

They have suffered.

Not many will agree with me, but the way this current Manchester City play (again, when they are at their top form) remind me of Manchester United in the 90s. Not exactly the style, but more of the determination  they display and the terror they release to their opponent. It's like they're roaring "We are a solid team and we will break your dreams" and that exactly what happened.

But all hell really break loose when I found Manchester City youtube channel. It's just pure gem. Hilarity. Cure your curiosity about behind the scenes that took place at a club.

I saw them training. I saw them laughing. I saw them teased each other. I saw the "inside joke". And I hate when the old saying "Tak kenal maka tak sayang" hit me. They are no longer "just players", they become people that you care about. Before I knew, my Manchester City folder had reached 2GB in size and growing. My feet has sunk deep and there's no turning back. I signed for a life of hell: loving two clubs from the same city. I signed for rivalry. I signed for inevitable torn for the derby. I signed for the possibility of no matter which team win, there will be a half part of me that break into pieces.

I'm such a masochist.

What made it even worse is that I forgot that I'm also a Hufflepuff. This time it's a bad thing because by instinct I will automatically root for the underdog, and in this case, it's Manchester City.

Yes, they won the Premiere League last season. Yes, they beat MU in both derby, one with magnificent score of 1-6. But those somehow don't really made me count them as the top horse for this derby. Like I said, I had bad hunch.

Perhaps because they're still not at their best, they still have not found their form this season. The only match they showed the same grinta, if you will, was only when they faced Sunderland, early this season. That was Manchester City that I fell for.

But after the International Break, they struggled to get back to it. Much because many key players were injured and still injured until now (Micah Richards ;_;).

And I had bad hunch.

When Sunday came, I was asleep and watched the match 20 minutes late (!!!). Showed how much excitement I had. Either that, or I was too nervous that it took all my energy and made me felt tired and sleepy. A little bit of both, perhaps. And what happened next reminded me of a certain day in the 90s, when MU faced Liverpool, a first big match for a 13 years old me. My two favourite teams met and I rooted for Liverpool, the one that could fairly considered as underdog compared to the mighty Class of 92. I was hoping Steve McManaman, Robbie Fowler and Jason McAteer could do their job. They did, just not well enough as MU won 3-2. My first big match and my first taste of defeat. Bitter. Painful. As if someone had just carved a knife through my heart. I bleed invisible blood. I remember starring at the TV screen with hollow stare, like a ghost hoping for a second chance. Then, broken-hearted, I entered my room in silence and the lump I felt filling my chest was unendurable and triggered my tears. I cried. And I hated MU just a little bit. But not for long, because if you really love football for the sake of a good game, you can't hate the 90s MU that long, when they embodied the perfect football.

And history repeated itself. That Sunday night I had deja vu. The same bitter taste of defeat. More over if you think your team don't deserve the bad result. They got robbed by a man named Robin Van Persie. And at that moment, I felt what most of Arsenal fans must have felt when he decided to move to MU: the urge to kill RVP (not literally of course). It was just so devastating.

I screamed and shouted and jumped up and down when Zabaleta equalized only to broke down helplessly in the end. I was sucked in to a certain black hole a little too known, called frustration-because-your-team-has-just-lost, and had very little energy left. It's Mu vs Liverpool, French vs Italy in World Cup 98, Italy vs Spain in Euro 2012 all over again.

Monday was excruciating. I was struggled to see the beauty of life as if Dementors have kissed me. Yeah, it was that bad. Because it's not much the fact that they lost, but more of how they lost. And let's not talk about that detail, I don't think I'm ready, I still want to feel happy after writing this entry :(

I just hope this defeat could only fruitful for City, to give them a slap in the face that seems needed and awaken the long sleeping lion inside them, the new burning desire to win, like how Juventus' lost did to them, gave them a new grinta, a new power and determination. Because a true champion is not only shown by how you win, but also how you react when you're defeated, just like Conte, The Lion Heart, said.

So, release the eagle Blues, pronto! And fly high. And let me watch another brilliant display of football when you guys play on the pitch, the kind that will make me say, damn, I really love this game.

And I really really hope The Sheikh wont sack Papa Mancini ;_; I like Pep Guardiola but the thought of Mancini get sacks is just scary. *Sighs*

Champions League

Will City finally get their first win in their last group game?

Will Juventus manage to qualify to the next round?

Will Dzeko start?

Will Messi score?

Will Marco Reus and Mario Goetze bump their shoulder?

Will Papa Mancini's hair still look silvery gorgeous?

All will be revealed in these two days.

Meanwhile, on non-football related news, I still think Larc en Ciel's Jiyuu He No Shoutai is still the best rock song ever. It's not everyday you found a rock song that managed to put together a string of melody that sounds sad, in a cheerful, rock-ish way. See? Even my explanation sounds lame. You really just have to listen to it by yourself and experience the magic.

Much like David Silva's magic on the green pitch.

Sorry I can't stop mentioned him. One day probably I will, but not now. This girl here is still too engrossed and amazed by the way he plays.

And oh who am I kidding, by the way his hair looks too.

It's a given.

I just hope tonight Silva will manage to play his best, his signature run, creating holes in opponent's defense. And I hope Samir Nasri will be equally good on the wing. And Yaya Toure to stay firm in the middle and win possession. And Kompany will be fierce with his defenders in neutralizing threats. And Joe Hart to have one of his best performance. And most importantly, for the strikers to be able to score.

Dear Lord, please let them score.

Either Dzeko, Aguero, Tevez or Balotelli or even defenders like Zabaleta or Nastasic. Or even better, the keeper himself (hey, a girl could dream, right?) I don't even care if it's a lame goal, just as long as they manage to finish the attack and find the back of the net. Amin.

Oh Reus and Goetze, I love the way you guys play. So fast and sharp and smart and all dangerous, but, but please don't score tonight. Okay? Pretty please?

I'M SO NERVOUS!

Oh well, may the best team win. *shrugs*

Edit.

Just realized that City will have their derby against United this weekend, which means it is probable City will play their second team against Dortmund instead of the main one, to save the energy (and prevent injury) for the derby.


Oh well :/